Stop judging, that you may not be judged. For
as you judge, so will you be judged, and the measure with which you measure
will be measured out to you. Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s
eye, but do not perceive the wooden beams in your own eye? (Matt 7:1-3)
Introduction
For months, I have kept thinking about this comment that
another PC volunteer made. He/she said that Indonesia has a great
interpretation of Islam going on, because they made Islam their own. They don’t
try to copy exactly what Saudi Arabia does, and they interpret things here
differently.
Generally speaking, I’d have to say the Indonesian (or at
the very least, the East Javanese) Muslims interpret Islam liberally. Here in
Java, Islam has been mixed for so long with Javanese culture (since the 1400s)
that often my question, “Is this a Muslim or Javanese tradition?” results in
the person screwing up his/her face to think about that.
One example of the liberality of Islam in Indonesia is the hijab. The US Consul General, Joaquin
(who, side note, is as cool of a ConGen as one is ever going to find!),
believes that just in the last few years Indonesian women have began
consistently wearing hijabs. When he
was ConGen here just over 10 years ago, he said hardly anyone wore one. Now,
women do everywhere I go. I have never seen and will never see the hair of over
75% of women I know and over 90% of my students.
The evidence of
Islam liberality can also be seen in the clothing women wear. Some women
(children through 40-year-olds) wear skin-tight skinny jeans, regular old
long-sleeved shirts (some of which are very form-fitting), flashy high heels
and finally, a
hijab. This is in
comparison to some Middle Eastern women’s legal obligation (or perhaps heavy social pressure to adhere to tradition) to never show a square inch of
skin in public. In Saudi Arabia, for example, "Muslim women in public are required to wear the full-body
abaya, generally black, and the
niqab, a black headpiece which covers the entire face and head, leaving only a slit for eyes." (
USA Today)
Perplexing Fact
The most perplexing thing about this liberality, however, is
my reaction to it. As a liberal Christian, I should be jumping for joy that
Indonesians own their Islam and do not feel too restricted. Instead, I find
myself looking for ways to criticize people for being “less Muslim” than, for
example, Muslims in the Middle East. There is no rational explanation for why I do this, as theoretically I prefer to see Muslim women wearing
whatever they want instead of making them wear gloves to hide their apparently
too-sexy hands in 120oF heat. Christians are free to wear whatever
they want, and I believe Muslim women should be in charge of their bodies, too.
Yet here I am, confused about my own judgmental reaction to the women who dress
in those skinny jeans and gobs of make-up.
Self-Awareness
Before I share some of the things I find myself confused
about, I want to state clearly here that I am 100% aware of my irrational,
uncalled for, and unfair judgment. I’m not hiding the fact that I am judging,
lest anyone try to peg me for being, I don’t know, a hypocrite? I'm not proud that this is what I am doing,
but I am being honest about my
thoughts. I believe thinking through my ideas allows me to see the positives
and negatives (in this case pretty much all negatives) of an idea and adjust
accordingly. Why share this with
you on this public blog? I am simply being honest. I am not trying to get
you to start judging Muslim Indonesians, too. That would be to opposite of my
goal.
Confusing
Observations
I find myself judging women for being “less Muslim” when
they wear tight jeans and tons of make-up. Isn’t modesty one reason for the hijab? Yet here they are, piling on
make-up to look cute and attract men’s attention.
I find myself judging my host family members when I know
that they don’t pray subuh before the
sun rises.
I don’t understand my school’s policy that girls must wear a
hijab to cover their hair, yet when
they wudhu (ablutions for praying)
the boys see their hair anyways.
I don’t understand why “it is better” if women wear long
skirts but it’s no problem when the skirt is hiked up to their knees while they
are riding a motorcycle.
Mostly, these things relate to women’s dress. I guess this
is because clothing is the main characteristic that distinguishes a Muslim from
someone else here. Many Muslim women always wear long sleeves and long pants while many Christian women wear knee-length skirts and t-shirts.
But then most of these covered Muslim women go home and put on ratty old pajamas (often T-shirts or nightgowns
that fall to the knee). The dichotomy is too much to handle!
My Excuse
So I’m judging. I guess the best excuse I can give is that I
find satisfaction in finding faults in the people who spend so much time
telling me what “good” Muslims are like and how they are “good” Muslims, not
like those other Muslims who aren’t practicing. The comment about them being
“good Muslims” is then, of course, followed by a humble (though perhaps not
heartfelt) declaration that only Allah
really knows. Of COURSE we want to be the better ones, the “good” ones, that’s
what it means to be imperfect humans. We desire to be the “best.” If Muslim
people really pass no judgment and have neutral opinions about the
non-practicing Muslims, then I’ll be darned. And teach me how to think like
that, please!
Turning it Around
So, it finally occurred to me this week to turn this judging
back around on myself. What do I do that makes me a “worse” Christian? One
surely can’t run around judging others without then judging oneself in the same
manner!
My first reflection was that Muslims simply have too many
rules. Rules about how to wudhu for
praying. Rules about how to sit when praying. Rules about how to kill a
chicken. Seemingly endless rules about women and menstruation. Rules about
eating. Rules about drinking. Rules about touching certain animals. Rules about
how many times one must wudhu after
touching the forbidden animal. Etc….
So when I consider what I do that
makes me “less” Christian, I have to consider that generally speaking,
Christians don’t have very many “don’t do this” and “you must do this” rules.
The 10 Commandments are the only concrete rules that come to mind. Jews are
still bound by the Old Covenant. Jews could give Muslim rules a run for their
money on who has to follow the most rules. Leviticus alone has over 200 rules. Anyhow, this lack of “do this” and “don’t do this” in Christianity allows for a
more open interpretation of what is “good” and what is “bad.” Turns out, I do a
lot of stuff that I’ve decided makes me a “less awesome” Christian.
·
I walk right past beggars and other people in
need.
o “Lord,
when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? …The
king will say to them in reply, “Amen I say to you, whatever you did for one of
these least brothers of mine, you did for me.” (Matt 25:37,40)
·
I do not consistently tithe 10% of what I earn.
·
I assume that everything I have to say is
important.
·
I don’t go to church every Sunday.
·
I rarely pray.
·
I attend church but don’t pay attention to the
sermon.
·
I am often angry with my students and say mean
things.
·
I am not thankful enough for everything I have
been given.
·
I do not have as much reverence for God as I
believe I should.
·
I gossip about my host mom a lot.
·
I always demand things from the school office
and don’t show gratitude.
·
I dress for clubs in a way that the media has
taught me, aka to objectify myself.
·
I don’t regularly read the Bible.
·
I think I’m a “better” Christian than those who
say they are Christian but in no way seem to live out their faith. (Isn’t this
ironic, just like how I judged Muslims for saying the same thing about
non-practicing Muslims…)
And so on and so forth…
The Improvements
Fortunately, this week I did attend church and I did listen
to the sermon. The pastor was preaching about leaving behind the sins of 2013
and becoming new in 2014. (I'm surprised that I understood even just a little
of what she was saying because this lady speaks lightening fast with a lot of
emotion.)
So whoever is in Christ is a new creation: the
old things have passes away; behold, new things have come. (2 Cor 5:17)
…You should put away the old self of your
former way of life, corrupted though deceitful desires, and be renewed in the
spirit of your minds, and put on the new self, created in God’s way in
righteousness and holiness of truth. (Eph 2:22-24)
In order to be come this better person:
…Everyone should be quick to hear, slow to
speak, slow to wrath, for the wrath of man does not accomplish the
righteousness of God. (James 1:19-20)
Well jeeze, I hear “be quick to hear, slow to speak” all the
time, but when you add on that this “DOES NOT ACCOMPLISH the righteousness of
God,” that really hits home for me.
We ought not to curse others (i.e. judge Muslim Indonesian
friends)
With [our tongues] we bless the Lord, and with
it we curse human beings who are made in the likeness of God. (James 3:9)
Let your speech always be gracious (Col 4:5)
Well, talk about feeling like a jerk. On Saturday, I just
finished a humorous speech to Carrie (via Skype, I didn’t go to Honduras) about
how I just don’t care anymore. I don’t care if people think my opinions about
corruption and cheating are too extreme or that I am outspoken. I don’t care if
my students cheat. I don’t care if someone calls me fat. Etc.
However, the scripture tells me to be slow to anger. And to
care about others. My message of “I don’t care” has no regard for how it makes
others feel. While I repeat, “I don’t care” so I don’t get mad, making others
feel bad in the process is not constructive. It’s probably better for me to be
angry alone that it is for me to hurt others as I try to avoid anger.
Thus, this week I’m really going to work on kindness toward
others. I have to respect that my values are not the same as most teachers
here. My endless gossip needs to end. Build up others, don’t put them
down.
I have to learn to hold my
tongue. I must pray that God would immediately relieve me of my anger. I must
withhold verbal and mental judgment of others.
Julia just sent me
this great article, too. Written by a Christian woman, it calls into questions what we really do when we say something offensive or judgmental to someone, and then tack on the words, "Oh, just kidding!"
Watch carefully then how you live, not as
foolish persons but as wise (Eph 5:15)
And once again:
Stop judging, that you may not be judged. For
as you judge, so will you be judged, and the measure with which you measure
will be measured out to you. Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s
eye, but do not perceive the wooden beams in your own eye? (Matt 7:1-3)
