Monday, May 6, 2013

When Death Comes Calling


One thing that strikes me as uniquely Javanese/Indonesian/my specific community (in comparison to my life in the US, that is), is that death is all around me.

I am fortunate to be a 24-year old American who has only known three distant acquaintances and one good high school friend who has died.

In Java, people are literally dying all the time.


Indonesia
USA
Male Life Expectancy at birth
68
76
Female Life Expectancy at birth
71
81
Mortality rate, under-5, (per 1,000 live births)
32
8
Infant Mortality rate (per 1,000 live births)
25
6
Lifetime risk of maternal death (1 in: rate varies by country)
1:210
(2010 statistic)
1:2,400
(2010 statistic)

Source: http://data.worldbank.org/country/indonesia.  All statistics are from 2011 unless otherwise indicated.

Lives here are frequently shortened by: motorcycle crashes, crossing the very dangerous streets, diabetes (from excessive rice eating, literally), and inaccessible medical treatment for things that could relatively easily be treated in the US (such as infant diarrhea or malaria).   

I have never felt death so present as I have in Java. One teacher from my school died in a motorcycle crash. A student’s mother died. A student’s father died. A respected elder in the community died. A friend’s grandma died. A friend’s 7-month old baby died. Two more older parents died.

While death is so present, I have only attended a few prayer ceremonies for the people who have passed away. The families, neighbors and friends pray for their loved one who has died for the following 7 days, then the 40th day, the 100th day, the 1,000th day, and after that an optional annual prayer day. These are called selamatan. This is a Javanese tradition, done by both my Muslim and Christian friends.

Fit's husband reciting from Al Qur'an at Riza's house.
Al Banjarian (which is only infrequently at these events)


One of the final prayers of the evening
(All the information here after is about Javanese Muslims). A selamatan involves cooking all day long. Then guests arrive either after maghrib or isha’, the last two shalat prayer times for Muslims. Usually it is the men who arrive. Women would head to the kitchen or back rooms and help with the final food preparations. 

The very sanitary practice of prepping the food on the dirty floor, pasti (definitely) without washing one's hands nearly frequently enough. 

The sweet treats that people will bring home (all 200 people!). Each box has 7-9 treats that were all homemade and hand-wrapped. I did the lumpur! 

The food that the 200 people who come will bring home (usually rice, tofu, maybe beef, a hard-boiled duck egg (always!), noodles, and a very small amount of veggies).

Table with food
Bu Ya is cooking up a storm!

Mega vat of carrots

Some innards which will most def be eaten...and most def not by me! 
The cooking starts the day before, into the night, and for the whole day of the selamatan. Nurul is exhausted after cooking for 2 days for 200 people. 

Burial process:
When someone dies, the immediate family is notified first. The people of the same sex as the deceased help to wash the body. They sit with the body on their laps and very, very carefully wash the body. There are special clothes to actually cover the private parts of the body when they are not being washed yet. After hand-washing the body and carefully patting it dry, cotton is inserted into all the orifices of the body (ears, nostrils, mouth, anus, vaginal opening for women). This is so that water or moisture does not enter the body later upon it’s burial in the ground so the body remains well-preserved. (However, Muslims do believe that the body decays and just the soul goes to God). After this, special white burial cloth (called a kafan) are wrapped around the body. Men are wrapped in three cloths and women in one.


This white figure is essentially what the body looks like after being wrapped. However, the face is covered, too. The cloth is gathered and tied at the top of the head like this. This photo was taken at a festival. Indonesians believe that ghosts look like this, more accurate to an actual dead body than the sheet-wearing, arm-flailing ghost Americans have. Because ghosts are covered in white, when Indonesian babies or little kids see white people, sometimes they are scared because they think that we are ghosts.





During the time in which the family is bathing and preparing the body, a graveyard worker has been informed that someone has died. They immediately dig a hole. Another person is sent to the nearby town to buy and engrave the gravestones. Muslims have two gravestones, one to mark the head and one for the feet. The one marking the place of burial of the person’s head includes his/her name, birth date and death date.

This is THE Indonesian graveyard. No matter where I go in my district, this is exactly what they look like, with the same trees in every graveyard!  

When the body is then ready, it is put on a slab of wood to be carried to the graveyard. Burial is done immediately for Muslims, so within a few hours of death the body will be at the graveyard. People walk through the town to the graveyard in a large procession.


Here's my handy guide-to-Javanese-Muslim-burial diagram!


At the graveyard, the body is put into the grave. A man from the person’s family then goes down into the grave and does the call to prayer (adzan) and iqomah (like a prayer that finishes adzan). This reminds the person that they are Muslim and what their beliefs are (I testify that there is no God but Allah and Mohammed is his prophet). At birth, fathers also immediately whisper adzan into the baby’s right ear and then iqomah into the baby’s left ear, sometimes before the baby is even cleaned off. This is to insure that Satan does not enter into the baby’s ear.

After this, the hole is filled up. Finally, people may take a handful of dirt and sprinkle it on top of the completed grave.

A note on East Javanese mourning: PCVs have frequently commented that the Javanese way of mourning is unsettling. Often PCVs have seen people smiling or laughing at these funerals. I can't say that I have seen that. However, I have only been to one funeral. Bu Lastri, a teacher from our school, died in a horrible motorcycle crash. Many of the female teachers and students were openly crying. Other than this funeral, I have only been to the 40 day, 100 day, or 1,000 day selamatans. Because time has already passed since the death of the person, usually the people are a little less formal. Laugher and smiling is normal. 

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Secret Life of the American PCV


What exactly happens when a Muslim village-dwelling, long skirt-wearing, Indonesian-speaking PCV goes on vacation?



Wear shorts.


Who wears short shorts? 

We wear short shorts!

Which directly correlates to the need to run to the beach to tan because one’s pasty white legs blind people.
Awas! Super white!


Wear a dress that shows some skin!
Maybe I'm a hat person after all!


Imbibe in some cheap drinks (let’s face it, still on a budget)
(Stolen from my Singapore blog!)

Es degan...right from the tree. I saw the boy climb the tree, cut down the cononut, and then whack it open with a machete. Indonesia. 


Share a hotel room with boys, gasp!

ID6 (Britteney, Alex, Brian, Dave and I) at the meet and greet with ID7

Stay out past 8 PM.

Oh my gosh, it's getting dark and people aren't running for their homes!
Sunset over Bali





Take a hot shower.


Use toilet paper.


Eat bacon.
Bacon breakfast!


Eat until one’s stomach is bursting.
* Turns out that’s something I’d rather not continue…
I sorta felt like this! 

Unfortunately, sometimes our indulgences ended in a "what the heck is this?" situation. This is "Hawaiian Chicken Salad. We expected lettuce with pineapple and chicken...Instead she got a scooped out pineapple with chicken salad in it...interesting...
Eat a burger for the first time in a year.


2 days after eating that burger, eat fish and rice again and realize that buying a $6 burger was stupid when you can eat a delicious $2.50 fish from a tropical island. And it’s cheaper. Maybe now I can buy another cheap drink???

Puffer fish! (this picture is false advertising, I did not eat this!)

Wake up after 8 AM, as this island is significantly less Muslim than Java.
* Well, once, anyways.




Pura Batu Bolong di Sengigi (Hollow Hole Temple in Sengigi)
Hindu offerings 


Pura in Mataram, Lombok's capital

Pura Meru, the largest Hindu temple in Lombok. It was built in 1720 by a Baliensse Prince named Anak Agung Made Karang of the Singosari kingdom. This was built in an attempt to unite Lombok. It is dedicated to the Hindu trinity of Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva. (source) 



Speak in English idioms.
* Which are frequently interrupted by “apa?” (“what?”). That is basically asking oneself aloud what one is trying to say. Very Indonesian. Example: “It’s raining cats and apa? Oh, and dogs.”
** Ending questions with “ya?” Example: “Let’s walk around the island, yeah?” “Let’s eat at 7 PM, yeah?”


Some friends of a friend who teach "Cake English Course" in Mataram, because English is a "piece of ...apa? cake." 


Freak out at the people trying to get you to take their taxi. It’s not my community, they won’t see me again.

Sit in air conditioning.

Have no shame in telling people what your schedule is and not feel guilty. It’s my vacation, I will do what I want!



Gili Trawangan is beautiful!!

Tumbleweed-esque, Lauren Millikan! 

In the words of Julie, "I see why The Bachelor brings people to islands like this."


Impress the locals by speaking Indonesian.

Chatting with local fishermen, who did not actually want to chat with me, sorta a nice change of pace! 

The boat they take out to drop the net in the sea.

Come back young!

It takes them an hour to pull in the huge net.

Avoid speaking Indonesian at all costs so as not to have to have a conversation with a stranger when you are on vacation darn it and just want to be left alone! Stop looking at me!




Despite being away from my village, some things don't change:

Refuse to take private transportation because 100,000 Rp/$10 to go somewhere is ridiculous when I could go for 3,000 Rp/30 cents.
Cidomo (horse-drawn carts) 

Julie, super thrilled

Being floored when an Indonesian unexpectedly begins speaking amazing English, despite the fact that you know you are somewhere teeming with tourists.

Feel scandalous and the object of everyone’s attention when walking along the beach with your close guy friend (who is married with a kid and you have no attraction to).

Ask the hostel owner to borrow 2 buckets to wash your clothes in. Why use a washing machine when it’s sudah terbiasa (already normal) to wash my own clothes?? And anyways, there’s another way to save a couple thousand rupiah for a Western meal!



And now some random shots from the trip! 
Julie's face reflected all of ours at this strange performance. "The Bubble Show" from Latvia. Ok Surabaya, why not?? 


Nusa Tenggara Barat museum 

See the next picture. Yikes!




Super cute boy on the boat ride home! He knew it, too! 

Mt. Rinjani!!


Sunday, April 7, 2013

Masih hidup setelah satu tahun di Indonesia


I’m still alive after one (crazy) year in Indonesia.




Random person: “Sudah berapa lama di sini?” (How long have you been here?)
Me: “Sudah satu tahun!” (Already one year!)

I’ve been living in Indonesia, as of April 3rd ish, for one whole year! This definitely calls for a little self-reflection. This is just gonna be a mish-mash of information…because that’s sort of what I feel like living here.




Words/phrases to describe my experience here:

o   Masih hidup- I'm still alive! (My signature saying until I got yelled at one too many times for saying at inappropriate times, like visiting my fellow teacher in the hospital. If I have learned one and only one thing here, it is that Indonesians and Americans do not exactly have the same sense of humor.
o   Oalah- oh my gosh
o   Mister! – enough said
o   Bule- foreigner
o   Angkat tangan- I throw my hands in the air (aka, “I give up!”)
o   Tambah gemuk- You’ve gotten fatter.
o   Tuhan Miss berapa? – How many gods do you have, Miss?
o   Bisa makan nasi? – You can eat rice?
o   Alhamdulillah- Thanks be to God! 
o   Cari orang sini aja- Just look for someone here (to marry).




Kalau satu orang lagi membilang saya harus lebih sabar…

(if one more person tells me that I should be more patient….)

I’m more sabar (patient) than I’ve ever been in my life.

One volunteer from ID4 or ID5 said that after we were done here, we’d be happy to watch paint dry, no problem. I’d probably have to agree.

As long as there was no man smoking in my face while I had to wait for that paint to dry. And no dangdut music, either.

My patience is manifest as thus:
o   Yes, you can (usually) take a picture with me like 10 times, as long as you ask (unless I’m on vacation, then the answer is always no).
o   You are cheating on the test? Whatever. If the Indonesian teacher doesn’t care, I’ll also slightly reprimand you and then turn away again, too.
o   My patient answers of, “Yes, I can eat rice. Yes, America has rice” countless times.
o   Oh, the bell rang like 10 minutes ago to go to class? Okay, we can finally go to class. Not like I was waiting for you or anything…
o   “Mungkin.” A simple “maybe” to the long speeches on why I should get married to an Indonesian and stay here forever (which is NOT happening, I can promise everyone that!!) is most easily met by a “maybe.” Which is inevitably followed by a “gak gelim” (spelling?) “She doesn’t want to” translated to the nearest person, just in case that person didn’t speak Indonesian??
o   My simple “How are you doing?” is met by blank stares. Rather than freak out that they still don’t know this phrase after I’ve used it at least like 30 times, I just change it to, “How are you?” “I'm fine, Miss!”
o   A class of 28 students has 2 people who did the homework? Okay, we’ll forget the lesson plan so 26 of you can just do it now instead. We’ll even give you 30 minutes longer than you need to complete the assignment. The 2 who did it, you can just sit there. 
o   “You shouldn’t underestimate our students, Sarah” is what Pak Udin tells me time and time again. I just smile and nod now, and then the next day when they all fail the test (after I gave them a study guide) or only 2 of 28 students have done the homework, I get my satisfaction.
o   Go ahead and talk about me. It’s inevitably gonna happen so I don’t try to stop it anymore.
o   I wait for the rain to stop. I wait and wait and wait. And then 25% of the time my plans don't happen because it’s still raining. And I just shrug it off now, a little upset but what can you do? How could I go anywhere in the rain?? (Unless I had one of those sweet bodysuits of plastic rain pants and coat. But I’m too cheap to buy that.)




See if you can figure out what these words mystery compound mean! (answers at the end)

matahari = eye day
orang hutan = person forest
kacamata hitam= glass eye black
tempat tidur = place sleep
bunga api = flower fire
selai kacang- jelly peanut
percaya diri- believe self




My new goal for this year is to be more humble:

My church group has a bible study/sharing/praise and worship time each week. When it’s not raining and I’m not feeling lazy to bike 30 minutes there, I go.

Last week I shared with my church that in addition to being more “sabar” (patient), “Saya lebih rendah hati” after living in Indonesia.

Which actually means “my liver is lower,” but “hati” is commonly used for heart too.

Thus, I was really saying, “I am more humble-hearted.” This has come in light of:

o   Embarrassing myself in class by getting too angry about unfair grades and cheating. PC staff explained to me that the Javanese perceive anger as weakness. Thus, I have to play it cool in these frustrating situations.
o   Realizing my mistakes and trying to apologize for them. I assumed that no one wanted to help me prepare a lesson plan for a girls’ camp, but then after finally asking a few teachers, they agreed to help. And then I called upon my patience training because some teachers sent me copies of the Wikipedia page rather than writing a 2-paragraph summary that I asked for.
o   Acknowledging that my Bahasa Indonesia is not perfect. It’s not as clear as I think it is. When I joke that “tata bahasa saya gila” (my grammar is crazy), I can’t just joke, I have to actually believe it, because it basically is. On Thursday I got upset in class after explaining, “Get in order by your birthday. But no talking.” (a common American ice breaker) and the students just stared at me. I had to remember that a) my directions were not clear to them, even though they were in Bahasa Indonesia and b) despite being 16 years old, they literally have never been asked to do anything like this before, so no wonder they are confused.
o   My recent willingness to try to pray aloud at the above-mentioned prayer group, even though I am very self-conscious that my prayers are quite unclear to everyone else. The humility really kicks in when I bite my tongue and don’t try to defend myself that “really, back in the US I can pray quite well. I pray aloud a lot in groups and my prayers are pretty good!”
o   A gracious thank you to my host mom or host brother that helps me change the propane tank so I can cook. I have tried various times to do it and always can’t. And as I am known by the Carleton girls of 4th Nourse dorm as the girl who said, “I don’t know if I should unplug this microwave because I’m worried it could like, explode or something,” I am quite humble enough to step aside for someone to help me change a flammable gas tank.
o   A humble (though still reluctant) acceptance that in Indonesia, I am a large person. I try not to be offended when people call me fat, assume my size is XXXL, or whatever. Generally speaking, I just stay away from buying clothes anywhere that people know me!





Odd relationships between words that frequently confuse me:

Kelapa- coconut
Kepala- head

Kerasan- to feel at home
Kekerasan- violence

Tuhan- God
Tahun- year

Masuk-to enter
Masak- to cook

Makan-to eat
Makam- graveyard

Murah- cheap
Muda- young

Jamur-mushroom
Jamu- tradtional medicine




Hilights of the past year:
o   Celebrating Idul Fitri with my host community
o   Being in my friend Indah’s wedding
o   Finding a wonderful church family, namely Since, Pak Agus, Gaby and Evelyne
o   Trips to Sumatra (with PCV Britteney) and Singapore
o   Getting to know the young men and women at my school who care about their education, go above and beyond to succeed, and are reliable
o   Sending and receiving some of the best emails I have ever sent/read from wonderful friends and family back home. Though we live in a world where it is so much easier to send and receive information via the Internet, I find that the distance still gives way to more heartfelt and sincere emails, reminding me why I love the people I do.




Answers to the mystery compound words!
matahari = eye day = sun (eye of the day)
orang hutan = person forest = orangutan (forest person)
kacamata hitam= glass eye black = sun glasses (black eyeglasses)
tempat tidur = place sleep = bed
bunga api = flower fire = firework
selai kacang= jelly peanut = peanut butter
percaya diri= believe self = self-confidence